Japan

One time Sam said to me Allegra memories are beautiful. Being a woman with history is rich.

I write this from my office desk where I found stillness. It’s Sunday, I triggered my runner’s knee at Komazawa Olympic Park, I just took shook my jet lag and my week finally whispers.

I’m 27 now. Allegra there is nothing that you lack. My step grandma said that to me once.

On Saturday I finally took down the postcard from my desk.

It was an image of a dream. Mount Fuji, flanked by pillowy cherry blossoms. On the back of it my mother’s encouraging note.

For years the postcard sat on my apartment door. Until September when I brought it to my work desk and pinned it with a blue thumb tack. In December I bought a roundtrip ticket to Tokyo.

Maybe one day I will have a daughter.

When you’re older honey I will let you borrow the blue silk scarf I found in Ginza. Or the Cambon I treated myself to for my 27th birthday.

Honey the breeze of pink Jasmine bushes in Omotesando was indescribable. And when Miho hugged me we both giggled. There’s fountains and gold foil at the Nezu Museum. Sweetheart those were the friends my mom, your grandmother, wrote to. When she mailed a letter to Fukuoka.

You could not imagine honey Miho’s gifts each sakura adorned and wrapped. Labeled to mom, dad and scattered with small flowers. Baby the small Sakura town that Nikki suggested was the sweetest place I ever saw.

Kwanzan blossoms lined the street and gathered at the base of Hasegawa’s Saesaezan characters.

Honey, while there I thought This Is Life Itself. And I slept with a song in my pocket and a richness in my heart so pure and warm. I was alone then those years ago but never lonely.

And baby the trains were as if from the future. Noses like a dolphin as cute as yours with streaks of blue and optic white.

One day honey I will bring you to see Kyoto’s green. And the Kamogawa river.

I will show you the egrets that perch close to the willows. I will make you close your eyes to feel like I did the wind along your face. I will tell you Look Up, Do You See? The mountains that Mari showed me nestled just beyond the tea house. Where the steam rolled off the hills into the clouds.

And remember, my darling, where the antique dealer keeps his combs. He will only show you as a secret.

Remember the crosswalk I stayed near? I will bring you there one day too. You will feel it. The bustle as if you are swimming in heaven’s pool.

I will give you the money for lunch to get the pancakes next door. But please, while tempting, don’t smoke inside. Instead my angel visit the diving store and ask him what swims here from Okinawa.

And sweetheart, I’ll say, if you are lost look North for Nagano. With Maria’s family. Say hi to Kimmy at Yakitori. He is the one wearing the Holy towel crown.

Takako, Kano, Allegra, and Kimmy

And baby, eat what you are served. It’s polite. Say Itadakimasu. Arigatou gozaimasu. Bow.

You’re in good hands baby. A Laugh in any language sounds the same. Find the tallest peak in Hakuba. Ride chutes and ladders of Don Quixote. Laugh like I did. Snap pictures on Fujifilm. Say thank you. Mean it.

Carry your trash with you. Take your shoes off. Trace your hand along the window on your way to the next spot. Smell the cedar from which you sake. Woody right? The forest can’t be far.

It was the happiest I have ever been in my life until you. Those 10 days in April the year I turned 27. It was beautiful. Like a dream. I saw it once on the postcard my mother gave to me.

When you’re older you can wear the Cambon.

Before you, there was all this dreaming I would do.

But I have some more dreaming to do.

Waving to Miho and Suzuka, smiling with Mari

To Riyoko, to my Mom, to Miho, to Suzuka to Peter to brilliant Maria your wonderful Nagano to Masaya and Kairi, Chad, Mari your perfect Kyoto I thank you all. It was an honor to see Japan through your world. I promise to show you mine.